Hi, my name is Chenai Mbanga! Welcome to my blog! I write to encourage, inspire and empower you in growing in your spiritual life through reflections and prose. I have been writing on this blog for 5 years now, and it has been a journey! Join me as I continue my journey toward self-actualizing.❤


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    Hindsight is my first book! Read about where the idea came from, why I think it’s important, and how it’s the book that led to self-actualization.♡
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    I’m the founder and owner of amazing plant based hair and body butter! Transform your hair and skin with our natural plant butters and oils!♡
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Latest Posts

Go Back: an excerpt from Hindsight


This is a short excerpt from my upcoming book: Hindsight

 Go Back


This place that you love and envision yourself in; that leaves your heart glowing with all kinds of possibilities; that offers the potential of a life that you can’t even put into words, yes, this place, this thing, it’s not for you.” (excerpt from Hindsight, coming soon).

I feel that we live in a world that tells us to pursue that thing that feels right, that makes our soul glow and gives us a sense of purpose; that compels you, and keeps you awake at night, and causes you to dream beyond what you ever conceived possible. Your soul soars at the prospect of achieving this life. And yet…. There is something else that you are meant to do on earth. There’s nothing wrong with your desire, but that life you have envisioned, and imagined and are striving so fiercely for…sometimes, life redirects you, and positions you for an entirely different mission and purpose. Has that ever happened to you? Have you ever designed your life with the intention of going left, yet, destiny is pulling you right? The loss of what you imagined…. It is this loss that I came head to head with in this journey toward purpose and fulfillment and self-discovery. Letting go of my desire, and listening to that inner voice compelling me to Go back. 

Going back and starting over. Going away from the fantasy of what I desired. Going back to the very beginning. And it is a loss that I’ve had to get over, and learning to subdue the tentacles of fear that arise with starting something unfamiliar, uncharacteristic and completely requiring my commitment in an entirely new way. 


Have you ever pursued something so relentlessly only to hit a wall and be told, “Go back to the starting line. This isn’t the way you’re supposed to go”?