SoulTea

Whoever slanders his neighbour secretly I will destroy. Whoever has a haughty look and an arrogant heart I will not endure |Psalm 101:5|

When I started my job we went through a whole thing about confidentiality and not sharing or talking about peoples’ private information; even inside of work, we have to only talk to the person with whom that discussion is relevant. And that discussion kept coming up over and over.

And today it has made me thinking about gossip; the gossip I’ve listened to, shared; never seeking facts because I’m not invested in the story to that degree, but still engaging in the salacious juicy details. Funny enough, I separate myself from what I perceive to be the egregious gossip from the small, palatable titillating kind that is harmless and not necessarily worth getting up and arms about.

But gossip separates people. It drives a wedge between friends, family, colleagues, and it plants seeds of strife. It has certainly influenced my perception of the person/people being talked about, and it’s difficult to value someone when I think I know who they are based on the negative things I have heard, even if within that negativity there are facts.

A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret. (Prov 11:13). It’s funny how we can be both these people: a person who can keeps someone’s confidence, and also one who betrays it. Even if we do not go about spreading false reports, why are we helping a guilty person by being a malicious witness? Why are you sharing negative information about someone with others when they have no need to know it and will most certainly not be part of the solution?

Whether you think it’s a big deal or not, don’t be the foolish person who uses their mouth to destroy your neighbour. Yeah, you may not know the person, nor even care for them, but keep yourself from having a hand in destroying them. Don’t even listen to it; why choose to be a witness to someone’s evil? Gossip erodes your integrity, hence its insidious nature.

Be a person who can keep the confidence of your loved ones, friends, acquaintances.

If someone can be fired for sharing private information, and companies lose the public's confidence for doing the same, imagine the blessings you are blocking because your mouth is doing too much, and you are not guarding yourself against such folks.

Be a person who maligns no one [but be] peaceable, gentle, showing every consideration for all people. |Titus 3:2|

**SoulTea**

Pic by @xtraxa

Are you familiar with the story in the twelfth chapter of Luke, where Jesus is telling his disciples to beware of the Pharisees and their hypocrisy? Within that chapter He further explains that there’s nothing covered that shall not be revealed, neither hid that shall not be made known. And as I read this verse over and over, thinking to myself, what an ominous message for wicked church leaders; the words instead glared like flood lights on my own heart. The pharisees had an outward righteousness and inward corruption. They appeared holy and would critique people for their lack of devotion, but behind closed doors they behaved just as bad, if not worse. They were ritualistic and pretentious. And that’s Christianity for you: raising a mirror to your own heart and seeing your own hypocrisy staring you in the face. And here I am arrested by both disbelief and panic. In what way have I been hypocritical? How often have I judged someone for doing something that I am doing/have done. How many times have I paraded around righteously while doing wickedly behind closed doors? In what manner have I behaved myself a pharisee?

There is nothing hidden that shall not be made known. Can you imagine all your shortcomings laid bare for judgement? But God is merciful. I can’t count the times my hypocrisy slapped me in the face and there was none the wiser. But God made it known to me; I was made conscious of it, so that I could show mercy, change, and be humble. So that I could busy myself with taking the log out of my own eye rather than arrogantly pointing out the log in another’s eye. How we are so quick to see the ungodliness of another while swimming carefreely in our own!

All in all, I should not to be arrogant; but rather check my heart, my motives. Ask the Spirit to search my heart so that I may speak and judge righteously, with wisdom, not emotionally. In this I can bring my case to God, clean and without my own sin condemning me. At the end of the day, leader or follower, some folks are not interested in seeing where they are wrong, and acknowledging their methods were all wrong. So their own sin remains.

Of all the ways that you could miss heaven, do not let it be because your own pride and arrogance and self-righteousness led you astray.

Repent of your sins and carry your own cross.

***

SoulTea

pic via @mybeautifulafrica_

Pic via @mybeautifulafrica_

I call you. I hear you slurring your words as you answer. I dismiss the image of you sprawled wherever you are, drink in hand, eyes glazed over. I tell you it’s me, and you cheerily greet me. I cringe. I tell you the purpose of my call, and as you respond, I can almost see you striving to not slur your words; the deliberateness of your words, yet not so deliberate; the slowness of your speech, your odd breathing… I want to ask you what I already know, but I stop myself. It’s none of my business. You stun me with the next words that come out of your mouth: “I adore you!”

I mutter an awkward thank you, and quickly get off the phone.

I could say much about this interaction. I almost expect it every time I have to call you. Once upon a time I’d sit and think about why this is so; why this has to be a common theme with you. But I’ve learned to back off. I end up thinking about what needs to be done rather than what is happening. I think about the work required and where a person ought to be, rather than dealing with things as they are. And so, I leave things as they are. I leave you as you are. And I hope one day soon a braver soul than I can ask why this is a consistent thing for you, that at any moment I call, I get a slurred, incoherent version of you. And perhaps they can be there to really listen, and they can exercise the patience, understanding and the appropriate boundaries needed for such a thing. I don’t want to assume, and that’s why I back off. It’s why I get what I need and hang up. It’s why I do not kick up a fuss. I’m tired of kicking up a fuss and being misunderstood. Accused of judgement. Accused of misunderstanding. I have to learn not to care. I have to learn not to step into territory that isn’t mine. But I know also that even if it’s unfamiliar territory, when called upon, the point is not to impose my own expectations. I can only offer assistance when I am able. I can only point to the right direction. I can only be present in as much as I am able and comfortable; not because I am judging you, but sometimes people do more harm than good trying to be the saviour. In seeing you drown, I do not want to drown. In watching the life rope I throw at you be dismissed and looked down upon, I can only watch, and hope that God intervenes, and sends a strong swimmer to help you. I want you to be well.

This is not what God intended for you. It’s not what you intended for yourself, either.

And perhaps you are not strong enough to face what is holding you down, and it’s ok. But reach out to the one who can. Be selfish. Cling to the hem of his garment, not because you deserve it, but because you need to get well, get back on your feet. This life is not what you intended and he is the only answer. You can’t help yourself so ask that he helps you. Demand that he helps you.

But of course, only if you want it. Only if you want to take that step.

I’m not going to say do it when you are ready. A day may never come for your readiness. You may be ready every day and not be brave enough to fulfill that readiness.

And really, is being ready more important than being free?

*SoulTea*

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